


Genetics Fail

by commas_and_ampersands



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Minako and Mamoru's Miracle Hatemance, Sailor Moon R
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-08-30 00:07:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16754071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/commas_and_ampersands/pseuds/commas_and_ampersands
Summary: "I don't know why everyone always assumes I'm going to be inappropriate.""Would you like the list alphabetically, chronologically, or in order of importance?"





	Genetics Fail

**Author's Note:**

> Written August 2010; some revisions November 2017

The Senshi and Tuxedo Kamen have had a very bad day.  
  
First, there was the whole time travel thing.  Really, an evil genie in the time stream?  That just seemed unnecessary.  
  
The revelation that the Earth - or at least Tokyo - had been destroyed was not any better.  Actually, it was decidedly worse.  If they'd had time, they may have taken a few moments to mourn the ruined city and the hundreds or thousands of people who had likely perished in the devastation.  
  
And apparently Mamoru was the future king of Earth, Usagi the queen, and both of their future selves are about two steps away from dead.  Also, Chibi-Usa is their daughter.  
  
So all in all, not an ideal day by any stretch.  The transparent King has graciously given the group some time to recover.  Chibi-Usa is still sound asleep in Mamoru's arms, quietly sucking her thumb.  Everyone's staring in almost reverent silence.  
  
It's no surprise that Venus shatters it with the grace of a drunken bull.  
  
"I don't get it."  
  
Mars pinches the bridge of her nose.  Venus speaking in that particular tone of voice never fails to give her an instant migraine.  "Minako, if you say you don't get the process, I will hurt you."  
  
Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Kamen blush furiously once again.  Mercury feels profoundly sorry for them.  
  
"Mars, you were taught by the nuns.  My mother talks a lot when she's drunk.  I think its safe to say I should be explaining it to all of you."  
  
Now Mercury is too busy blushing herself to feel sorry for anyone.  
  
Jupiter clears her throat.  "Let me speak for everyone: please don't."  
  
Venus shrugs since this has nothing to do with her original point anyway; really, its Mars's fault for being such a prude.  "I mean I don't get why Chibi-Usa looks like... you know.  That."  
  
Tuxedo Kamen, who has never said more than three words to Minako in his life, now looks like he will very happily throw down with her.  "I'm going to need you to explain that immediately."  
  
"So sensitive today!  I'm talking about the pink hair."  
  
Tuxedo Kamen pauses.  He glances down at his future daughter.  And her pink hair.  "Oh."  
  
Sailor Moon leans closer, as if the pigment will change under closer inspection.  "That is kind of weird."  
  
"Thank you!" Venus shouts, exasperated.  She ignores Jupiter shushing her.  "I don't know why everyone always assumes I'm going to be inappropriate."  
  
"Would you like the list alphabetically, chronologically, or in order of importance?" Mars drawls.  
  
Venus pinches her and then ducks the returning blow.  "But seriously.  Pink hair?  I mean, purple I get, because of Usagi's mom--"  
  
"Oh, she dyes it.  She's a natural brunette."  
  
Venus rolls her eyes dramatically.  "Well, now I don't know what to think."  
  
Because Venus does have at least one shred of tact, she does not go venturing into Mamoru's parentage.  
  
"And wouldn't pink hair be... what's it... recessive?"  
  
The subject being too close to Tuxedo Kamen for comfort, the girls all turn to the other resident medical expert.  Mercury frowns.  "I'm not sure pink hair was really been documented genetically.  It's not exactly common."  
  
"And blue is?" Jupiter asks, unable to resist.  
  
Mercury pats her gingerly.  "Well, you certainly see it more often than pink."  
  
"And there's also the red eyes," Venus adds.  "Not reddish brown.  Red.  I'm not implying that she's inherently evil, so nobody bite my head off, but where the hell did that come from?"  
  
"Maybe her coloring is... normal in the future?" Sailor Moon ventures.  
  
Venus shrugs.  "I still say its a major genetics fail."  Then she turns on her heel and begins to skip out of the room, apparently ready to let the subject lie.  She's nearly out the door before she adds one final thought.  
  
"Either that or she's not Mamoru's."  
  
The speed at which each of the Senshi places herself bodily between Tuxedo Kamen and Sailor Venus is nothing short of miraculous.

**Author's Note:**

> I know, I know their hair isn't LITERALLY pink, it's artistic licence to differentiate between characters. And this isn't a very original joke. Really, I just like the chapter summary exchange. Plus any time Minako decides to needle Mamoru brings me such joy.


End file.
